I did indeed run Monday morning. Then I just got too lazy the whole rest of the day to bother with the blog. I even had the afternoon off. I napped. I lounged. I did a little laundry. I watched some “Foyle’s War.” But I couldn’t generate the necessary motivation to write.
Now, by virtue of a morning of laziness before working the night shift, I am in a mad rush to get anything together to entertain me and you for a moment. So here’s what I have. I stole a poem – and a poorly punctuated one at that.
Last week while housekeeping at my folks’ place (it’s my moonlighting gig) I was searching for a dustpan for the kitchen floor sweepings. I opened the obvious cupboards and in one stumbled upon this awesome bit of vacation kitsch. I have no idea where it came from because my folks have never been to Florida. The bottom of the flask is marked St. Petersburg, Fla. Not the most practical of flasks, being made of glass and thus susceptible to the dangers of drunkenness, it is still pretty cool.
The cap is black plastic like you’d find on an old medicine bottle – appropriate – and the bottle is cased in leather. The front has portholes at quarters to see the level of the contents. The portholes are marked, top to bottom: “One drink,” “two drinks,” “half full,” “damn fool.” I love the play on words with full and fool.
On the back is an image of a stumble-bum under a gaslight and a clever little ditty. I even love the misused “your” followed by the correct but unpunctuated “youre.” Fun stuff.
When your heels hit hard
And your head feels queer
And your thoughts foam up
Like the froth on beer
When your legs are weak
And your voice is strong
And you laugh like hell
At some damn fool song
Your drunk
By gosh
Youre drunk!
Today's Stats (Monday, Jan. 16)
Temp: 34 degrees F
Distance: 3 miles
Treasure: Nil.
iPod Playlist (shuffle)
Lady - Styx (Here's an odd alternate video)
Sleepwalking - Lyle Lovett
California (live) - James Taylor and Joni Mitchell
The Grey Havens - Howard Shore (Lord of the Rings Soundtrack)
Bicycle Song - Kevin Browne
Hold On - Yes (Alan White kicks a**)
Turn That Heartbeat Over Again - Steely Dan
I found almost the same flask in my Grandparents basement. Marked "Newfoundland" on the bottom. It has the same verse on the back with a similar man against a light post (in mine he is standing/leaning) and on the front there is an extra drink marker with the works "Boozy Smokes".
ReplyDeleteI stumbled across this blog because some of the words on the verse are worn, and I couldn't make them all out.
It was years ago that I found it and tucked it away in my own basement. I just found it again today and searched for the verse. I'm going to fill it up and leave it in my hunting pack!
Thanks!