Every picture tells a story

And so I have a bonus post of photos from yesterday's haul. And yes, every picture does tell a story. Thank you, Rod Stewart.

First we have an interesting new can. Ol' Glory declares itself "America's Energy Drink." The can features a rendering of Ol' Glory herself, the U.S. flag. Among the slogans on the can: "Energize Your Future in the Army National Guard." The can also bears the Pledge of Allegiance and a pledge of its own: "Ol' Glory is proud to donate a portion of its sales to support Operation Homefront. To learn more, visit www.olglory.com." Particularly amusing, though, is the obligatory warning: Not recommended for children, pregnant women or persons sensitive to caffeine. These Statements have not been evaluated by the food and drug administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease. Now that's a new one.

Besides the patriotic theme, the company's focus is to provide an energy drink at a more affordable price. One of the links on its Web page, The Stack Up, provides a comparison of Ol' Glory to other popular energy drinks (Red Bull, Monster and Rockstar) in the categories of cost, calories, caffeine, vitamin B12, guarana, taurine and ginseng. At 99 cents it is less than half the cost of its nearest competitor. Check it out ... if you dare. Personally, I wasn't impressed with my single indulgence in a Red Bull. If ya wanna get juiced, pop a couple of No Doz with your Mountain Dew.

A minor note here: As I was photographing the Ol' Glory can with a flattened Coors can that happened to be squashed perfectly so as to display the label, I was soundly chastised for interloping on territory claimed by some punk squirrel -- not the first time I've been admonished by one of these rambunctious rodents perched high above in the maple tree that lords over my patio. OK, I'm easily 20 feet below the bastard. Why is he so upset at my intrusion? If intrusion it can be called. All deference to nature and its domain, but mankind has overtaken this land and these little varmints should accept it.

OK, tirade done. Next up, hmmm. How to approach this delicately. I alluded to it in my earlier post. Mentioned in the "Treasure" list is a pair of "granny panties" (anybody seen "Zack and Miri Make a Porno"?) frozen to the asphalt over on Cherry Street. I almost picked them up. Seriously. I have no idea why, but dignity, what little I possess, prevented me ... for now. The bumper sticker on the pickup in the background, its tags conveniently obscured by snow, reads, "Defend Your Right To Bear Union Cards." Click on the photo and you should be able to read it. Maybe not.

Then there was the Certificate of Authenticity for a $100 Benjamin Franklin Banknote from the American Mint. Google search turned up an eBay listing for one of the coins, valued at about $25. What a joke. Some chump "collector's" piece. I wonder how many real deal coin collectors have one in their collection?

Finally, the two soft goods I picked up (for some reason I like finding this stuff in decent condition) were a green washcloth (now freshly washed and usable) and a black or perhaps dark blue ski mask. Alas, as is obvious from the photo, it is a kid's size. Doesn't quite fit my manly mug. Oh well, it makes for a humorous photo.

Let's hope next week proves as profitable. (As always, click on images for a larger version.)