An Innocent Man

So, I'm going to jail. That's right, headed to the slammer, and for what? I'm not sure how to feel about the charges against me. I'm wanted on two counts: being a nice guy and having a big heart. Maybe I'm not innocent of those charges. (No, I did not make up those allegations; they were leveled against me by a well-meaning co-worker.)

Ironically, those who might prefer that I rot behind bars for a long, long time, would say I am most definitely not, as Billy Joel sang, "An Innocent Man." And those who will reach into their wallets for cash and credit cards to bail me out undoubtedly will do so because they believe the charges against me. 

Is it any wonder justice is elusive and confusing? They say she's blind. I don't know about that, but she is a wily one.

I suppose it’s been a couple weeks (OK, it’s been three) since I was called by a representative of the Muscular Dystrophy Association to cajole me into participating in the 2012 Knox County Lockup for MDA. Lisa Strong, who works in the circulation department at The Register-Mail, is the rat stoolie who ratted me out to the MDA coppers. Boy, have I got her buffaloed if she was sincere in telling them what a swell guy I am. Ah, the MDA goons probably use that same story on everybody. That’s OK, I can take one for the team.

By “take one for the team” I mean I’m happy to try to raise the requested $800 bail and spend an hour March 27 enjoying a free lunch at Buffalo Wild Wings and harassing friends by phone. Really, what are they going to do if I can’t come up with the bail – keep me locked up? Talk about the ironic punishments department. Sure, don’t let me leave the BAR with loads of tasty chicken morsels and chips and salsa. Don’t let me go back to work for the day. Can you say woo-hoo!?

My goal in this endeavor is to raise $800 bail. That’s enough to send a kid to MDA summer camp. As a master procrastinator I managed to put off doing anything with this until now. If I were sure I could ask three people for the money during lunch, I’d wait ‘til then, but I figure I better get a start on it.

I’ll try to include the proper linkhere. If it doesn’t work, I’ll fix it soon. Let me know. I’m counting on you folks to get me outta jail – and, more importantly, to help out a kid with muscular dystrophy. Some of you will receive emails from me, too, just to cover all the bases. If you’ve already donated by the time I figure out how to do the email thing, just disregard it. If, however, you’ve procrastinated, too, just follow the link in the email and make a gift. It’s easy!

Well, that’s the meat. Here’s the potatoes:

The other cushion is further down the hill.

Finally got in a good run today. It was freakin’ beautiful outdoors. I did a mere mile and a half Tuesday and never got around to writing anything. Today I felt I could conquer the world. I love that feeling after a run. I passed up a work glove that was just gross (leather doesn’t wash up well). The flat basketball in front of Umbeck Mathematics-Science Center on Academy Street wasn’t worth anything but a couple of photos. And who needs nasty couch cushions from the roadside? The one glove I did scavenge may find its rightful owner yet. It was across from my church, so I speculate it was lost after Wednesday Night Live! activities last night. I washed it with several others I’ve picked up in recent weeks and I’ll drop it by the church Sunday or next Wednesday. Ah, my good deed for the day.

Today's Stats

Temp: 72 degrees F

Distance: 3.1 miles

Weekly Total: 4.6 miles

Treasure: 1 colorful glove; 1 leather work glove (too icky to keep); 1 flat basketball; 2 couch cushions (left where they lay); 13 cans.

iPod Playlist (Sweet WIU playlist)

An Innocent Man - Billy Joel

Only The Good Die Young - Billy Joel

Careless Whisper - Wham!

The Night Is Still Young - Billy Joel

Don't Let It End - Styx

I'm On Fire - Bruce Springsteen

I'm Going Down - Bruce Springsteen

I Want Your Sex (Parts 1&2) - George Michael