Perseverance Over Pain

I knew my knee would hurt. But when the pain was such that I considered giving up after the first block, I grew concerned. I stopped, adjusted my patellar tendon strap, and continued. A block later I was still thinking about quitting. This can’t be good for my body, I thought.

Not comparing my sore knee to Joe Theisman's brutal
leg injury. Just trying to grab your attention. :)

But I strove onward: west past Broad Street; another couple blocks to Academy; onward north. I know the route that will get me 3.4 miles, a little over a 5K. Still I contemplated capitulating. But I have to do this.

I began mulling over the need to see a doctor. What if he tells me no half marathon? What if he tells me no more running?! I’m not ready for that. So I figure I’ll power through it for now, adding some strengthening exercises and some stretches for my ankles and shins, and make this happen. If surgery is needed, it will still be needed later. And I will have reached my bucket list goal of running a half marathon. If I put it off this year, who knows if it’ll ever happen.

I hear the admonitions now. I remember telling a friend she was wise to listen to the advice of experienced runners who told her to listen to her body. “Don’t be stupid,” they said. She listened and allowed her body to heal. I tried that. Took off three and a half weeks. My knee felt much better. Then it hurt like the dickens the first time I put the pressure of a running step on it.

But what I found today, as with most runs, I eventually ran through the pain. It either improved with the strength bestowed by the process or it became numbed by the endorphins coursing through my veins. I really do believe part of it is a strength issue. That’s confirmed by some past experience and by the experience of a friend at Saturday’s Swedish Stomp.

Tom Colclasure, whom I mentioned in my blog from the Stomp, was telling me of his past knee injury, which sounded similar to mine (resulted in fluid on the knee, way back in my youth). Tom said when he started working out at a local gym, Maximum Performance, a trainer advised him to work on strengthening his knee rather than relying on apparatus to support the joint. He assured me it’s worked for him. And I believe him.

For now I’ll lean on the support of my patellar tendon strap. But I’ll work on making that part of my body strong enough to handle the stress and strain of running on its own. And if that’s not possible, well, I’ll burn that bridge when I get there.

Today's Stats

Temp: 56-60 degrees F

Distance: 3.4 miles

Weekly Total: 3.4 miles

Treasure: Strength

iPod Playlist (Shuffle):

Union of the Snake – Duran Duran

Fisherman’s Blues – The Waterboys

Evil Train – Trampled Under Foot

Back to You – John Mayer

Dance Hall Days – Wang Chung

The Night ChicagoDied – Paper Lace

Losing Grip – Avril Lagigne

Brandy (You’re a Fine Girl) – Looking Glass

Mr. Jones – Counting Crows

In the Mood – Robert Plant

Rompin’ and a-Stompin’

“You suck majorly right now.”

That was Molly’s assessment of me at 7:30 Saturday morning as we parked on the lawn outside the Bishop Hill Colony School. There were just a couple other cars there and nary a soul in sight. Registration for the Swedish Stomp started at 7 a.m. Race time was 9. I know it’s a small race, but I figured we should arrive early since Moll wasn’t pre-registered.

“Huh. Guess we coulda slept in,” I said, surveying the scene. That’s when my darling daughter assured me in no uncertain terms she would have appreciated the extra winks and that my standing in her 14-year-old world just then was on par with Cinderella’s wicked stepmother.

Well, we sent inside the old school, where volunteers from the Bishop Hill Old Settlers’ Association were taking registrations (there was one other runner at the table), making coffee and setting up for the morning’s event. We took care of our registrations (mine was graciously paid for by a dear friend who couldn’t attend and transferred hers to me). Olof handled the paperwork. Or rather several Olofs handled every aspect of race day preparations. The volunteers wore the same name on their tags, after Bishop Hill colonist and artist Olof Krans. 

Randy "Olof" records a registration.

Krans was a self-taught artist who captured scenes of everyday life in the Swedish colony known as the Utopia on the Prairie. His works are displayed in the Olof Krans Museum in this historic bit of bucolia.

Well, we went about the usual pre-race rituals of pinning bids, potty-visits and pontificating. Eventually friends arrived. Molly’s friends Harper, Anna and Gillian were there, along with Harper’s brother, Jackson, and dad, Tom, who is a friend of mine. Tom, at 44, was running his first 5K (same age at which I started), as was Jackson. Gillian was cheerleading today, as she was recovering from a cold. We chatted and milled about until race time, showing due respect at the singing of the national anthem and then finding a spot on the road for the start.

It was a beautiful day for a run – 43 degrees at 6:30 and I would guess 10 degrees warmer than that at race time – and barely any wind, though the giant turbine blades on the nearby wind farm were spinning slowly. The course is sort of flat. OK, it’s a mix of flat and hilly, but the hills roll gently and the countryside is lovely – except that short section near the 2-mile mark that I referred to as a poop farm. The manure smell was strong there, but I saw no sign of livestock. Maybe I was blind. On the return leg I yelled to Harper as she ran beside me that it must be a poop farm. Later, Moll agreed, and laughed at the prospect of such an enterprise.

Our group did well. We were a slew of seconds. Tom and I finished second in our respective age groups, as did Molly and Jackson. Anna placed first in hers, though technically second because a girl in her division was the women’s overall winner and eliminated from division placement. Harper finished third in her division, but ahead of me. I’d say we rocked! I’m thinkin’ team T-shirts next year. Maybe Gillian and her mom and Harper’s mom will join. Those gals have done this run. We’d represent Galesburg well.

Medals hang from a rack set upon an old
Bishop Hill fire truck awaiting distribution.

Props and shout-out to Tom and Jackson, who were running their first 5K race. I love new runners because I know what a life-changer running can be. Way to go, guys!

Post-race, we unwound in Bishop Hill Central Park (I think that’s what it’s called). Tom and Jackson returned to Galesburg and I shepherded the girls. We visited the Colony Bakery for delicious treats, which we carted off to the park. We swung on the swings and spun on the merry-go-round, gobbled our goodies and had an M&Ms war with the Peanut M&Ms Gillian brought. I can’t believe how many I ate after they’d landed on the ground. Molly was chucking them at me from the spinning merry-go-round as I sat at a nearby picnic table. Then the girls started flinging them at each other between the merry-go-round and the swings. It was a regular candy cannonade.

Gee, I’ve blathered on so about the race and the funstivities afterward (that’s fun+festivities) (and I don’t care if that’s technically redundant) (I mean, are festivities necessarily fun?), I don’t have space to delve into Bishop Hill history. Not that I’m an expert. But at one time I harbored a cache of knowledge relative to the past of this place. My 2004 Rotary International Group Study Exchange team shared with Swedish Rotarians the story of Bishop Hill in an entertaining fashion. Much I have forgotten. But I took pleasure in informing the girls of the irony of the bronze plaque set into the faux-brick sidewalk two blocks from the school in commemoration of John Root. Surely he is a notable figure in the colony’s history. Or, more accurately, a notorious figure. 

Moll overshadows the John Root Walkway.

You see, it was Root who murdered colony founder Erik Jansson. It’s a convoluted and incomplete story, but you can read bits of it here. The part I remember is that Root wanted to marry Jansson’s daughter and the colony leader forbade it. I believe they wed in secret. Later, when the two men were in Cambridge on separate court matters, Root shot and killed Jansson.

Now, I am all for latching onto the nefarious for financial or historical reasons. Hey, if you have claim on  Jesse James or Adolph Hitler, why not milk it, rather than hide it? But it seems odd to me to have what amounts to a memorial to Root in Bishop Hill. It’s like having a bronze plaque for John Wilkes Booth outside Ford’s Theatre.

Go figure. Hey, I’m no historian. Just a B.S. artist.

Today's Stats

Temp: 43 degrees F (at 6:30, not sure about race time – quite pleasant)

Distance: 3.1 miles

Weekly Total: 5.95 miles

Time: 32:20
Place: 2nd in Men's 45-49
Overall: 52 out of 83

The little girl carried by her dad did a
face-plant about 8 steps into the Skamperoo
and lay there for about 10 seconds before
rising, in tears. Dad to the rescue scooped
her up and carried her the rest of the way
along with her sister. Beautiful moment.

iPod Playlist (Shuffle):

Strong Tower – Kutless

Unwell – Matchbox Twenty

Reality – Newsboys

Busted – Matchbox Twenty

Bullet the Blue Sky – U2

Against the Grain – Garth Brooks

The Man Who Couldn’t Cry – Louden Wainwright III

Whiskey from the Bus – Ryan Adams (live studio banter)

Don’t Stop (live) – Fleetwood Mac (Great inspirational finisher! This is the awesome video from "The Dance," with the USC Marching Trojans joining the band on stage.)

OK, sidebar for marching band geeks. I remember watching this concert on PBS years ago with my now ex-wife, also a marching band geek. We loved it. Can you imagine the awesomeness of performing on stage with a major rock group like Fleetwood Mac? I remember the mystique of "Tusk" and the USC band when that first happened. To watch this years later was phenomenal. What a memory for those USC students, as it would have been for their predecessors.

White Line to an Exit Sign

So, I am bereft of ideas, again, and my efforts to find inspiration in the pure endeavor of running have proven fruitless – also again.

My primary dating profile pic. Taken by my buddy Kent.

I asked friends for ideas.

“Running. The motion. The tread on your shoes. The number of times your feet touch the ground. The smells during your run.

“The counting of (fill in the blank) while you run,” one suggested.

Another proffered:

“Maybe house hunting? You had to pass some houses on your route and it got you thinking about pros and cons of homeownership.”

And so I ponder. Surely I can conjure some thoughts on the act of running. The experience. And yet I feel if I try to draw on memory void of conscious effort I might come up short. Might miss something. I need to think about it while I’m doing it so I really remember something worthwhile. Obviously I can’t take notes while I’m running (not without a recorder), but I need to focus on that goal.

How about contemplating homeownership? Perhaps. But that doesn’t resonate right now. I mean, it does and it doesn’t.

Another time.

Some family's vacation photo from 1959 in Minnesota.

I had thought of revisiting the Minnesota vacation slides. I really need to. I have so many to consider and surely there is something to be said there. Or maybe they’d be good for an occasional entry of random photos with very little text. Sure would save me the trouble of thinking and writing.

I’ll keep that one in mind for sure. Bound to come back to it sooner than later.

In the meantime, may as well delve into my preoccupation: relationships. Dating. Love.

While preoccupied with the subject, I’m really doing much better in that realm. Not so obsessed that I am constantly in search. Not looking at every single woman I meet as a prospect. But I can’t stop thinking about it. And I can’t stop perusing profiles on at least one dating website.

So here’s what’s crossed my weary mind in the past 24 hours. This is what I was thinking about a woman I came upon who happens to live in Chicago. Ugh.

Question: Can you miss that which you've never known?

'Tis a bit of a Catch-22. Were it not for the miracle of online dating services we'd never know of each other's existence. So how would one miss the other without the knowledge of his/her existence? And yet, by this electronic maelstrom of emotion and information we learn of potential mates/matches outside our immediate spheres of experience. Certainly that wasn't possible in 1783 or even 1983. 

So, presented with this damned Sears Wish Book of humanity, we're given a view to the possibilities that are out there, whether realistic or not. Suddenly we can see our dream, only to realize the dream is out of reach.

What are you to do when you find that person who, on “paper,” seems such a kindred spirit but is 150 miles away? Is it worth even contemplating? Hell, I had trouble developing a relationship with someone less than 50 miles away I thought was an incredible match.

So do you just write it off as fancy? Move on? The ONE will come along as a matter of fate, because that’s how the universe works? Or, more precisely, there is no ONE, but rather many MATCHES with whom we can possibly create that lasting relationship? 

Anybody? Anybody? Bueller? Bueller?

Today's Stats

Temp: 36 degrees F

Distance: 2.85 miles

Weekly Total: 2.85 miles

Treasure: Treasure is off the menu for a while. Unless…

iPod Playlist (Shuffle):

Running to Stand Still – U2
Captain Jack – Billy Joel
Allentown – Billy Joel
Don’t Shed a Tear for Me – Paul Carrack (For those who don't know, this is the song from which the title of today's blog comes.)
Push – Avril Lavigne
Hand to Mouth – George Michael
I Melt With You – Modern English
Money – Pink Floyd

Just Like Starting Over

So, D3’s track coach says that skipping a week of running is like starting over. Coach may be right. I skipped three weeks and I’m paying for it. Sure, my knee feels better, though it still hurts after a run, but 5 miles was hard Thursday morning.

2012 RR Days 10K finish. This inspires me. I CAN do it!

I’m on a running roller coaster. Started the year strong, got soft, tried to pick it up again, took three weeks off to heal a bum knee… Now, six weeks out from the Galesburg Half Marathon Express and I’m worried. I’m reluctant to assign percentages, but running is a mental game as well as a physical game. I’m noticeably lacking in both capacities right now. What will it take to get back in the game? Do I have the mental toughness to do it? The determination? The Willpower?

And what about the physical side of the coin? I started with a stretching walk today, on the advice of a friend. After a couple blocks I started jogging. It felt great. The feeling continued until about the halfway mark. A little after that point I slackened my pace to a walk for half a block. I needed the break. Later I stopped dead at a traffic light. No running in place. Stood still. Then I walked the final block to my door.

So I have questions. Doubts. Do I need to run 13.1 miles before I actually do a half marathon? Must I go the distance first? Or can I do a few 8-, 9- and 10-mile runs and figure I’m ready to push through come race day?

Tonight I expressed my fears to a running friend, one who has inspired and cheered me for a couple years now. Here’s how the conversation played out:

Me: I'm getting scared about the half.

Her: oh come on chicken butt

don't make me lay the smack down on you!

Me: Took off three weeks to rest my knee - patellar tendon pain. Feels much better, but I'm way out of training now. Five miles was killer today.

Need to get my head straight.

Her: I'm in a don't give me no bs mood, not that your feelings aren't important or valid....but you ARE capable of this!

You have plenty of time. The race is not tomorrow

or next week

Here I am before the start of last year's Run Galesburg Run
Half Marathon/5K. This year I'm doing the half.

Me: OK. Yes, ma'am. God, you're a great cheerleader. I know I can do it. Just self doubt.

…

Me: Don't do well with training regimens. Need to do it on my own schedule, own terms.

…

Her: I hate training plans! Queen of do it yourself training right here

OK. So no excuses. I can and will do this. Just as I’ve told other friends who expressed doubt about their ability, I have in turn been bolstered. Belief is at least 50 percent of the recipe to success. If the ingredients don’t go sour, I’m already halfway there.

Today's Stats

Temp: 54 degrees F

Distance: 5 miles

Weekly Total: 8.29 miles

Treasure: Water, water everywhere…

iPod Playlist (Shuffle):

Put Your Lights On – Santana Feat. Everlast

Ready to Love Again – Lady Antebellum

Problem Girl – Rob Thomas

Bad Blood – Neil Sedaka

Memory – The Call

All I Want Is You – U2

Say – John Mayer

Love Me Do – The Beatles

Stickshifts and Safetybelts – Cake

Only the Good Die Young (live) – Billy Joel

Give Me the Night – George Benson

It’s Still Rock and Roll to Me – Bill Joel

Max’s Theorem (live banter) – James McMurtry

Levelland – James McMurtry

Goodbye – Avril Lavigne